Maybe I should have established a title with my significant insignigicant other. I dont know where I stand with him or what is allowed in our "relationship" (for lack of a better word.) We call each other shorty..which in reality means nothing and I was fine with that at first until we became involved on another level. Feelings of attachment popped up and now here I am. I'm torn about the whole situation because at times I care..but other times I dont. He's away at college doing what he does and im here in school doing what I do. He's made it halfway clear that he wants me to just wait for him until he gets back, but then its like because there is no title, label whatever I cant possibly restrict him. I know boys will be boys so I cant tell him what not to do ya know. When he comes back for Thanksgiving Break I doubt I am going to want him to touch me let alone be with me because I can picture him running up in a million other girls. This could be a really simple situation that I am probably making difficult. I want him to care enough about me but a big part of me says he doesnt and I'm okay with that sometimes until that girly part of me comes out and starts complaining about the arrangement. Im at a loss here. I dont know what to do, I cant talk to him about it because it just feels weird and out of place for my concerns to be there. Hell actually its pretty much a sex thing when we talk anyway..I should end it here but its that darn attachment factor. I really wish the brain outweighed the heart because I hate wearing that crap on my sleeve. Hopefully with this month apart I can will myself not to think, text, call or aim him. [Sigh] I guess I have to suck it up and deal with it right.
1 comment:
This shit is so true.. You are not alone.. Trust.
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